In my life I’ve experienced my ability to manifest my intensions, which is a very powerful state of being.
So, when I was faced with self doubt about my work and other areas of my life, it was paralyzing. I felt stifled and
self-conscious (quite the antithesis to being a fully expressed–creative being and not at all authentic). I wanted to, and needed to, get back in touch with my power, my inner knowledge and once again trust my voice, not looking over my shoulder at what I think others will see as “success” or what the market deems “valuable”. I did what my inner child knew to do...and without realizing what I was “doing” I created a spell to dis-spell my doubt and drive away my fear so that I could move, once again, through the world with ease, confidence, and joy. I energetically casted this spell during the process of painting it. Making my first “Spell” painting felt like everything was finally coming together...the union of the physical, the intellectual and the spiritual...and that this was what making paintings has always been for me. My wish to connect to the viewer and share my paintings’ meanings and intentions led me to want to include the spell in the work, as well as have the viewer pariticipate in some way. Now, the spell associated with each painting is written and sealed on the back...a sort of recto-verso, or an inside-out. Another envelope to write one’s personal wish is also attached, and in doing so I am making available to the viewer my process of manifestation and inviting participation to create his or her own meditation on the subject we are now both energetically casting about.
Making paintings begins with an intention, and the alignment with the physical, the spiritual, and the intellectual results in a transformation. Through the use of the physical gushy stuff – pigment and solvent, and my powerful intentions – I transform the material into an energetic experience that is evidenced by theses iconic paintings made as a result. I am transformed by each painting I make. The materials are transformed. My wish is for the viewer
to be transformed as well.
There is freedom and intentionality in this work, and to have a sense of freedom and intentionality at the same time is euphoric. Just what I wanted to manifest in my life…
The Aim of My Brush
This gushy stuff I push around on a surface which becomes something that has meaning is my elixir. It echoes
my desire to alternately surrender and triumph. My triumph comes when a painting connects with another human
being, stirring something inside and drawing one back to look at it again and again.
The aim of my brush (my arrow) is to make paintings that convey my longing to notice and find meaning,
personally, emotionally, spiritually. I want my work inspire wonder and mystery, a sense of completion despite fragmentation. If can make something that another human being connects with, then the aim of my brush
Life Informs Art/Art Informs Life
The heart of what it is to be human contains our often secret and rarely celebrated questions, doubts, fears, dreams, fantasies, desires.
Making paintings is a physical, metaphysical and spiritual act. It is my way of linking to my inner and outer worlds, as it is simultaneously interior and expressive, physical and spiritual, intellectual and emotional. As is true for
all of us, what we do, how we think, and every choice we make has an impact on us personally, and on the people
in our lives that we encounter, whether intimately or briefly, and on the world.
“I’m trying to remember what I felt about a certain Cyprus tree.”
~ Joan Mitchell, Painter
“...if one can bear that, it is such a beautiful thing; to sit dwelling in a mystery.”
~ Stan Brakhage, Filmaker